Dipo Tepede.POeT

the story is very interesting and all u said it's true. Most ladies of now and days enta into relationship justbecos of wat they can get and not wat they can give. Not having at the back of their mind that relationship is like a bank account dat u can just withdrawing without puting money there. But again to be sincere with oursef again Nigerian guys are not ready 4 commitment

I like this writeup of urs and to be frank with u it is what is happening in our society especially NIGERIA. most ladies enter into a relationship for thier own gains alone not considering that of the other party and I BELIEVE HAD THEY PUT Theirselves in the MAN'S shoes would they still have reason the way they did right from the very onset?

Ur rite but i dont support a man beating a woman no matter what she does. Remember a man shld have self control. A man with out self control is like a city
with out walls anything goes

@Yetty
Why not try http://www.nairaland.com to post your story and people will respond to it with useful advices you may find helpful.

hi dipo.nice write up.
u made some points..
however, i do not agree with the idea that a lady should be slapped by her partner be
cause she did something very offensive.i feel hitting a woman is wrong ..no matter
the offence(except maybe she's an assasin and u are hitting her in self defence!haha)
)....i really feel bad when i hear people discussing about wife battering and the first
thing the guy says is 'what did she do'..then later he says'that served her right'

first and foremost.there is no relationship without CONFLICT, it's how you handle
the conflict that matters...so the issue of physical abuse being justified by conflict/
bad behaviour by the partner ,doesnt go down well with me...
secondly, let's just imagine that the same woman is his boss at work(and not his lover)NO MATTER HOW MUCH SHE OFFENDS HIM HE PROBABLY WILL NEVER EVER raise his hand to hit
her.. because he's trying to keep his his job...
what am i trying to say..two people can treat u in the same annoying way, your boss
and your lover..A GUY WOULD NEVER HIT HIS BOSS..but 'in our society' it seems ok
and even 'macho' to hit ur girlfriend or lover' if she deserves it'
it's all about self control and not what anyone does to u....CONFLICTS ALWAYS COME
IT IS HOW U HANDLE IT THAT MATTERS.
no guy should be patted on the back for beating up his wife..there are more sensible
and mature ways to handle relationship issues ..
it's pity, we dont 'sue' so much in Nigeria.....if not some men would be in jail by now,
for almost killing their partners, BECAUSE OF LACK OF SELF CONTROL!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I am a young girl in my middle twenties. I am kind of facing some challenges about marriage. My mother wants me to get marry as early as possible. Mostly to a guy I brought, though I brought the guy home to show them but now and kind of confused. I am not sure am in love with in him anymore. My mother said maybe because we have been dating for almost two years then that is why I am fed up of the relationship. I have sat myself down several times to understand why I don't love him anymore but I can't just say. Though he is a nice and caring guy but he gets angry easily, mostly he doesn't take to my advice, we really don't have conversation together, he wants to be around me all the time and he English is poor.
I just meet a guy, though we have been friends for some years now but not too close. I fall in love with him.
The question is it the new guy that made me realize I don't love this guy or is it natural. I am confused, my mother wants me to get marry to the 1st guy next year. But I really don't want to but she never allows me rest in the house to the existence of her calling the other not to ruin her daughter's life.

Please I need a motherly advice do I go on with the wedding or what?
Thanks

I read the story and i certainly would not be quick to say that women are to be blamed. Sometimes, like the bible says the heart of man (male/female)can be desperately wicked. What do a female do when a guy she stood by for 6 years suddenly wakes up to tell you that the family just realised that they cannot go ahead with the wedding plans because they dont feel like traveling outside of Lagos? I mean this is a guy who has been faithful to a relationship ffor 6years? This is someone who cannot take a decision except she agrees and practically do everything with the lady in question making the lady to sacrifice everything she has even to the point of loosing teeth via an accident on her way back from giving financial assistance to the supposed man of her dreams? Would you say she is not committed to the relationship? For all these i would just say something it takes the grace of God and i still stand by what the bible has written and believe that it is only God that can give any man/woman the relationship that would bring peace that only God himself can give.

yes,it helped,dat u responded to me sure helped